A blog about home birth, pregnancy, childbirth, motherhood and all that good stuff.
(blog formerly named What Ifs and Fears are Welcome)
I love your website. I had a horrible experience with a midwife/home birth! Luckily my baby survived after a hospital transfer. I was convinced to have a home birth after watching business of being born and influenced by my husband who was born on The Farm. Now I am pregnant with my second child and have been gathering my research to try to get my husband on board with my plan for a hospital birth this time. I live in an area that is dominated by home birth advocates and am friends with a handful of home birth doulas and midwives and I face constant pressure from them to try another home birth despite telling them my story and that I have strong feelings against it! It's refreshing to see the statistics backing up my gut feelings; I feel like I was duped the first time and am more confident to trust my own opinion this time around. Thank you for your blog and keep up the good work!
It upsets me so much when I see pro home birth advocates pressuring women and making them feel guilty for their doubts and feelings. Because we as women are often raised to be polite and passive, setting boundaries with these types of people can be difficult. I really encourage you to start setting boundaries with people who intrude on you in this way. Let them know that it is NOT OKAY for them to pushing their opinions on you. It is your choice, your body, and your baby. Period.
I hope everything goes well for you with your pregnancy. I hope you are able to give birth where you know is best for you and your baby and that your friends and loved ones support your choice. Sending you big hugs and good thoughts for a stress-free pregnancy, healthy baby, and easy recovery for you <3
I just want to say THANK YOU Dani for your amazing blog. It is so inspiring to see someone so passionate about the rights of women standing up and using their voice. I started researching home births after a friend of mine told me she was having one. It started out as curiousity, but now I am completely obsessed! I can't believe these monstrous lies are being sold to women as facts and that the resulting deaths of babies are simply being swept under the rug. It's disgusting!It's one thing to offer home birth as an option to women while presenting them with the risks and accurate data. It's quite another to BLATANTLY LIE and overwhelm them with propaganda. I really started to question this whole "home birth movement" when I heard the same regurgitated lines over and over again. "Birth is natural", "modern medicine treats pregnancy like a disease", "hospitals are patriarchal, oppressive and bad". Throughout history propaganda has been used to convince people to do things they normally wouldn't want to do. So I really started to wonder - if home birth is such a good thing why all the propaganda? Why do I read and hear the same tiring lines over and over again in every article, blog post and youtube video that talks about how great it is? Are these people REALLY thinking for themselves or are they being indoctrinated?Normally when people formulate thoughts on their own, there is a hint of individuality and uniqueness in the thought. But when someone has been indoctrinated by a group with an agenda, you can tell that the thought is not their own because the same thought is repeated ad nauseum with no uniqueness to the person voicing it. So, we really have to ask ourselves - how is this movement "empowering women" if they're not allowing them to think for themselves? Isn't indoctrinating women disempowering them? Shouldn't we be allowing women to look at the facts and data and come to their own conclusions? They say they "stand with women" and "trust women", but do they really when they are telling women what to think and why to think it?
Thank you for your comment. Amen to all of it!!
This is super helpful and easy to follow/understand.Do you mind if I share it on my Facebook page?https://www.facebook.com/homebirthlossandtraumasupport